:D

Back to singing, drawing and talking nonsense.

pemutih gigi

di tujukan kepada pecinta pecinta produk pemutihan gigi. termasuk beberapa ahli keluarga ku.

lagu malam

kegedikan, lawak, kecantikan kadang-kadang tidak transcend across cultures.

oleh itu, saye malu. dan passwordnye ialah

dalam banyak-banyak beger. beger apa yg happy

:P

tebelet baru wieee..

hawayou

Push down post

This is a push down post. The purpose of a push down post is to push down embarrassing posts. Like push down facebook status, to push down embarrassing statuses. Since deleting a post makes you look uncool, posting a push down post helps to keep your coolness while distracting other people's focus.

Anyways, I'll be home in 2 weeks. Miss home and will miss being here too.

On to the next unknown chapter!

Tribute to Douglas Adams. Happy Towel Day!

Happy towel day 2010!

nothing can stay hip forever. this is cute and funny.

influencia

deria realiti

Perbezaan realiti, membuat kau yakin.
Kesusahan hidup, membuat kau tabah.
Tapi kau harus sedar kau hanya gila.
gila relatif, deria realiti.

'realiti aku, realiti sebenar' kata si polan

'tidak! realiti aku realiti sebenar' bantah si polan 2

'sesungguhnya, realiti aku realiti sebenar' sahut si polan 3

realiti hanya di otak.
kau celik, kau mati. bagaikan mimpi.
realiti hanya di otak.
ambil dadah, semua nya berubah.

ah so...

Sometimes, dreams are more real than reality...
At times, reality becomes too dreamy...
As time passes, reality turns to just dreams of memory...
but it takes more than just dreaming, for dreams to be real.

when there is nothing better to blog about.

that's me and the talented brown kid aka my brother.

till I'm a bit more articulate,

hawa.

go go rasputin

Its a pinata porno for many reasons. We put too much effort in it, so we haven't smacked it yet.

self note

Someone asked me the other day.

'Are you poor?'

I paused and started thinking..

'You are not poor if you had to think about it.'

Hmm. A reality check for how grateful I should be.

I have a loooongg story about the guy who told me

that. One of the most bizarre story in this trip.

I want to hire someone who can draw

a graphic novel for it. I can pay in Pesos.

I'm now in Tijuana

I've done my first couchsurfing! The first place I've ever couchsurfed in my life was in west Hollywood. I've been telling joey, to make it either hotel or hostel.. Not couch surfing. It's a cool concept but, I hadn't have the guts to do it. I love meeting strangers in real life. That's fine for me and i do it alll the time. haha. but having no clue before hand except for a few exchange of emails and staying at their place and them being people with a totally different backgrounds from mine... It was pretty intimidating. But it turned out pretty good. Had a great host! :))

Couchsurf.org is a whole lot of fun.

Don't tell JAKIM no. They might make a new fatwa, saying it promotes khalwat or whatever.
Cause in actuality, some people do switch from couchsurfing to couchfucking. hoho.

It's up to what you want.

------------------------------------------------------

I'm going to miss LA.
The drama above all. haha.

It was certainly a crazy and fun trip.

------------------------------------------------------

oh, and I'm currently in Tijuana and sick. Getting better though. I haven't gone out from the hotel yet since we checked in. There were drug warnings, and every person I bump into will tell
that TJ is dangerous. The drug people will cut out people's tongue, head, hands to random people.. and there were a few missing families. And there was also warning for the coming spring break. Freaked me out a bit. And since I'm sick, my motor nerves wont be working that well.
Ahh.. see how it goes.
The flight to Mexico City is at 5! Can't wait for some Fiesta. ~~~~~~~

snippets of san fran 0.01

this got me laughing so hard. inside joke with myself for a vegan wannabe.

random youtube meetup. semua prasan famous.

we cycled the whole day in san fran

with this tandem bike yang memecahkan bontot

no idea why is he in the middle of san fran

also went to alcatraz and found this butch girl

This is not a subliminal message

Next Monday pegi LA.

I CANT wait. :D

So anyone in Cali, who wants to drive 2 tourist with giganto cameras around their neck

around town drop me an email at

hawa [titik] othman [at] gmail [titik] com

I see a few silent regulars, so this will be the best time for us to meet. :D

Chatroulette.

Hawa baru discover chatroulette a few days ago, thanks to zek. Menarik jugak. Dorang assign randomly, chat ngan sapa2 with webcam and mic. Pastu kalau tak suka, just tekan next. Banyak dicks though. Literally dicks. So tak sesuai untuk kanak2 bawah umur.
So far dah jumpe banyak betul jenis orang. tapi x bes sangat main lama2. kadang2 main saje je utk tengok muka2 orang2 dalam dunia ni yang bejenis2. sminit boleh tengok lebih dari 20 orang kalau saje nak surf orang. klau rasa nak borak bleh. mnyanyi2 ke jerit2 ke maki tak tentu hala ke. tapi lagi bes kalau internet laju.
orang2 chatroulette so far yg penah tengok..

1. budak2 college tengah party
2. bars2 random2ly kat dalam dunia yang memang sentiasa bukak chatroulette
3. orang yang tengok tv sambil webcam.
4. orang2 yang curious pasal chatroulette jugak
5. dua tiga group terus buat kungfu2 right after nampak hawa... jakun ke ape xpenah nampak asian
6. lelaki pedo
7. pompuan2 comel
8.orang2 tengah kerja

bes kalau jumpe bende2 pelik. ade budak ni, die cakap die jumpa Jonas brothers. gile x aci.

Pastu dah jumpa hanging man! haha. memang expecting dan tertunggu2 mamat ni pon.. sebab dah baca kat news pasal hanging man nih. Jumpe2 terus excited. Pastu pose. Patutnya pose tekejut. silap. hahhaha. next time lah. kalau dapat jumpe lagi yang macam susah. sebab main ngan probability yang kecik.

amir, hawa gemok tak.

kalau down. ambik gambar diri sendirii.....!! :)

you should go shopping with me you know.

How yummy are these. I saw. I grabbed. I hugged. And now they are officially mine.
:D :D :D

The philosophy of "ada aku kesah?".

We love contradicting stance. We just love it, like these


1 Malaysia = We are all same and equal but we consist of different species.

I am half liberal and half conservative

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

So, I'll start with today's rant with the topic of:

The extensive philosophy of "ada aku kesah".

The first time I heard this phrase was back in 2009. I think it was during July, when there were lots of events, bringing Malaysian students studying in Australia together in Sydney. There were also lots of other Malaysians that came over for holidays and joining the winter events.

That's usually the time, we usually exchange current malay lingo and buzz words among our students. Keassabiahan malay students in Melbourne are more profound and it shows when their excessive use of certain words eventually penetrates to other states.

You know, the excessive use of words like 'boleh relax tak' 'terbaik' 'ke' 'dowh' 'down'. Since its overseas, with a knit tight bunch of students, the waves of buzz words are more pronounced, rather than a mixture of all like back in Malaysia.

So, back to that July 2009, that's when I first heard "ada aku kesah". Which annoyed me to death the first time I heard it.

It means 'do you think i care?'.
It is an extreme attempt by malays to show that they are not 'bizi bodi'.

"Ada aku kesah" is said in the most sarcastic tone you could ever imagine. Some people include more annoying facial expression, like an i don't care attitude.
It is used by people who 'kononnya' don't care.
It actually has a question mark to it and it's a yes or no question in malay. But no answer is expected.
So, if someone, says 'ada aku kesah' don't go and answer it.


"Jeles? Ada aku kesah?"
[jeles ke.. wahaha padan muka kau jeles. in your face. kau jeles pun. kalau kau nak jeles, aku tak kisah. tapi padan muka. segala apa yang kau buat pasni, aku kisah sangat2. because, i'd be so happy for whatever shit that happens to you.]


"si polan dah break ngan si polan. sebab dot dot dot.. ada aku kisah? hahahha"

So 'kisah' here as in care.. actually has nothing to do with not being nosy.

1. What happens is, people who use it or the subpopulation of people who uses it usually thinks they have a don't mind attitude. And pridely tells his/her friend about their stance.
Like, you can do whatever you want, it's a free country and I won't mind.
2. In actuality, it's you can do whatever you want; I care because other people's drama are so interesting to be gossiped about and whatever shit that you fall into I won't care. I care about your drama, but I don't care what happens to you if you fall into a deepshit.

I've read a blog, it wrote something like;

Kita harus menerapkan, mentality 'ada aku kesah' dan jangan bizi body...

The usage of those string of words, was a bit contradictory. Triggered me to hate it even more.

"ada aku kesah"
-sounds tabloid.
-doesn't help human kind
-creates enemies
-indenial

So now, why it went viral? I would guess.

1. It's a trend thing. like how 'gitu2' was everywhere during the early 00s.. TV is also a media for this phrase, used by the _____ _____ azwan ali.
He tried to look cool, by saying 'ada aku kesah' about the trash people talk about him. But it didn't work. It would never work for him. And I turned off the tv.
2. It is a form of escapism. Were taught since kindergarten 'mengajak kebaikan,dan menghalang kejahatan' where kejahatan and keburukan which some parts are relatively different to the larger scale of earth, molded by rapidly evolving societies, constrained by religion and adat2 traditional and privacy is one of the last things people in our country fight for. So in defense of being stereotyped by the people around them after mentioning a contradicting statement, choosing 'ada aku kesah' to close up the sentence is perfect.

I know its a year too late to write about this. But just wanted to get it out of my mind.
What do you think?

Life is like a mirror, we get the best results when we smile at it.

oku pond 140210

on eating alone: try being a girl at night

I couldn't have noticed it clearer until I came here. How asians love being in groups. Maybe sydney doesn't count since its already 'infested' by 'us'. Here, its pretty common seeing someone walking alone, eating alone. But not for the bunch of asians, they'll usually be in fours or even sevens. Its too clear not to notice the difference.

In Malaysia, people stare at you when you eat alone. Its not a common thing to do, so its not a common sight to see. Even if people aren't staring at the person eating alone, the person who's eating alone would get conscious like people are actually looking at them and get all fidgety.

experimented eating out alone for the past 2 months because 1. I wasn't working. 2. I don't cook (its a waste cooking alone) 3. I was living only with my dad who also doesn't cook was kinda busy last month. 3. Got to a point, asking friends to eat out with me, was too time consuming.
Breakfast lunch and dinner.

So eating mamak was the perfect option for a lazy bum who doesn't mind curry. Almost every other night when I don't have dinner with my dad or any other plans. I walk across the street and eat at the most famous kayu nasi kandar in the whole wide malaysia. At around 8 to 9 pm...
Occasionally later, maybe 12 to 1 am.

This is when I get to see people's reaction.

Location: tipikal malaysian mamak
Subject: a girl alone late at night
Type of experiment :observational

What I gathered.

1. I guess people will look. I won't say stare. but look for maybe an extra 3 seconds than usual.
2. everything is usual, until I start eating. because the moments before I eat, people usually assume or guess I'm waiting for someone else. *This is for the people who actually bothered. People who don't actually care are not included in this observation.
3. I would say, mamak at night.. excluding families. has a ratio men to women around 5:1
Maybe more distorted as 9:1 when there's a good game that is.
4. It takes an oblivious person not to know people are talking about you or just a mere mentioning with a glance.
5. Men eating alone is much acceptable, I could see people don't care.

Its a simple thing but, how its accepted between sex is so different.
Less women go out late at night, because it is less acceptable even by other women aka moms and makciks. And I think people assume that it is a norm that women don't go out late at night just because you are a women in malaysia. For people using safety issues, I still think its such a sexist idea. The people who judge has nothing to do with safety. Nobody goes to mamak, melalui lorong2 gelap unless you are crazy.
I talked so much only to come to that point.

Next pembebelan which will soon come is how i HATE people using 'ada aku kesah'.

Sorry, for certain things i admit i'm a hater.

cowboy country

howdy dowdy

oh man. lama gila journey. tambah dengan right a day before mengada nak turun kl then naik penang dengan bas. inclusive semua transits yang seboleh2 nya minimum. 35 jam. dalam plane sahaja pun 25 jam. Finally I made it! dengan anxiety yang tak tentu pasal macam biasa. tu smua dah hilang. so yay. Excited sebab 1. jumpa mak and hanep. 2. 1st time since forever landed here (j to the a to the k to the u and n aka excited.. sorry) 3. sebab reunited dengan kamera2 mainan yang e eh. saya adee rupenye. ok banyak benda nak kena buat. tido and makan pun nak. keluar pun nak. muntah pun nak. diet pun nak. we'll see what happens. Pictures will soon follow.

predetermined life.

Kenapa banyak benda telah ditentukan didalam hidup siap siap.
Why are there so many predetermined things in life.

Genetically, dah ada a few bunch of benda dah ditentukan. Penyakit, maybe IQ.. hormone levels...
Then, genetically you will be a Malay ke a Chinese or a Matsaleh or whatever.. then other predetermined things will just follow you wherever you go. If you are a Malay you can't do this and that. Same for other races. Where the set of rules are not your choice. Be it written rules or unwritten rules. Celik2 je, these rules are imposed on you.

Socially,.. where you are born, akan tentukan how you would grow up. Which will then akan tentukan what type of rights you get as a human being. Human made rights. Where you don't get to choose as well. I.e you are genetically predetermined to get the benefits of a bumiputera, or an australian aborigine....

No questions asked. You just get it.

Jadi basically your rights are predetermined by your genes. I think especially in the case of gender.
Worse, if you were brought up in some countries, there is even moral policing. Men doing it. Perfectly fine. Women doing it? Morally unacceptable.

Not to mention, your rights to your own privacy, is predetermined to where you live in.
You can move out you say. But the same still goes for the other millions left.

Tak menarikkan, lagi2 kalau hak2 tu takde moral basis langsung or the "moral" basis is simply
MEREPEK. Just because it was written before, it is written now.

Ada option.... which is to fight for the rights that you want so badly.
Will you win that right in your lifetime?
You might....
Still depends which country you live in.

See, your life is predetermined, but you have a choice you know. Such an oxymoron.

Tomorrow is February already!

It's a devil's workshop but pretty rusty up here.

Notes to self on the last day of Jan.

1. This week is not like any other week like I did in January.
2. Up up up Hawa
3. House must be clean as I came back before I go
4. Record moments (Ive been lazy at this) Record, snap, tape, write, draw
5. Write down what inspires, not save.
6. I have to prepare to have a flat numb butt. You have to prepare to have a friend with a flat numb butt.
7. Implement, implement, implement.

I am super excited to go on this trip. Been talking about it for too long.
And the hassle definitely tested my patience. Its about time, before I rot any further.

bored.

This is where i get my money. Semenjak tiada lagi sumber pendapatan buat seketika.

Kadang2 dia gigit duit warna lain2. Ikut nasib.

Kadang2 dia gigit gusi je.

I am am I, Who am I?

Badak. Sangat Lady Gagarish. Tak sure whether people have figured out who they are. Its a meme of somesort trying to make people guess who they are. Lawaa and laawaa... Especially sebab dia guna weird looking animals. And that thing at the end yg nyawa nyawa ikan
also it has a killer beat.. (i have no idea what im talking about when it comes to beats., but enjoy!)




iamamiwhoami's youtube page

ugly inside out.

is it bad to say, ugly people are just ugly inside out.

boleh ke cakap ayat ni? 'dah la muka buruk, prangai pun buruk.'

atau cuma boleh kutuk pasal prangai dia buruk je?

tapi kalau prangai dia buruk sebab muka dia buruk macamana?

disebabkan keburukan muka dia yang terlampau hodoh, psychological impact orang lain terhadap dia dan keadaan sekeliling telah buat die jadi orang yang berperangai buruk

Pastu cuba kalau tambah dia tu miskin pulak.

Pastu tengah2 bengang nih. rasa nak mencarut. kita cakap

ko dah la buruk, miskin pastu prangai pun buruk. macam jahat kan.

tambah lagi satu kompleksiti. prangai dia buruk, sebab dia miskin.

sebab dia miskin, childhoodnya tak terjaga. Sebab dia hodoh, prangai dia hodoh.

Sebab dia miskin, dia tak pegi skolah. Jadi dia bodoh.

Sebab dia bodoh dan miskin prangai dia pun hodoh.

Macamana nak kesian kan kebodohan dan kemiskinan dia, kalau ada kehododohan perangai yang dibentuk oleh kemiskinan dan kehodohan dia terlalu teruk dan buruk.


Jahatkan generalization tu.

Tapi salah ke.

Tengok je American Idol ke. Yang hodoh tu prangai buruk, bodoh n suara tak sedap.

skang ni hawa ngah sakit hati, dengan sekelompok masyarakat.
sedikit generalisasi yang tidak adil, tapi contoh2 individu yg exact yg specific dlm otak hawe. rasa macam nk ketuk je.

'dah la buruk, miskin, bodoh, pastu prangai mcam setan'

fuh..

Ok. ada mana2 part hawa salah tak.

cerita ceriti

Sometime ago, in the middle of nowhere a girl was born. She was me. My parents didn’t actually know what name to give since they were so sure they would get a boy. But when a girl came out, they thought, oh okay, she’s the first girl so why not call her Hawa or Eve. I used to have an issue with my name, why isn’t my name Nadia why isn’t it Sarah or something more modern along the line. And since I stayed in penang, and my parents call me Hawa (kl style), but at school teachers and friends called me HawAAA sounded severely ugly. Which just added my hate towards my own name. and I thought, my name isn’t just old but its ANCIENT. The second being on the planet. Is it even possible to have an older name than that? Even Adam sounds much cooler than mine. Come to think of it, I really had issues with my name. There were a few points in my life I asked my brothers to call me by a different name. I can’t remember the names anymore but yeah that was the story. It also got to do with how my mom sometimes says she thought naming me Hawa was a mistake, because I cried too much and sesangat lah degil. And in the story of Adam and Eve, Eve was the bad one. Terasa lah jugak, because at times it did sounded like, I was the mistake and not the name. As a kid I actually went along with the idea, thinking that I’ll need to go tu JPN and change my name. One point I was actually excited to have an @ in my name. You know… small things that happen when you are a kid that affects you.

That was one of mine.

Penang should relocate to KL

I'll be away for the weekend!

Friday - Penang

Saturday - Johor

Sunday - Selangor

Monday - KL

Tuesday midnight - Penang

Penang should just relocate to KL. No, I'm serious. And yes it is possible.

short note

My Tres Leches Cake (via Pioneer woman) turned out osomm! I had it for breakfast, lunch and dinner, then breakfast lunch and dinner again because it was that good besides I was pretty lazy to get food anywhere else.

It tasted FAT.

gaga cookies

haha. my blog is back. so much for the wait, it has only become more vainer.

nothing interesting has happened,yet.. will try to write more in the future.

writing more, increases the probability of coming out with a good post. Writing less, doesn't actually mean it'll be a good one either. it only means less posts... by me... who is currently evolving into a boringer species.

I'm gonna couchsurf hunt in a minute. Or cute guy hunting. It states there that it isn't a dating site.
Sape kata nak date? xde sape. haha.

Go and open my google reader link! Lady Gaga cookies are soi dope.

femngaruttss...

Feminist satu feminist dua.

powergirl : wow, you survived that long in a long distance relationship.. must be tough.

perempuan 1 : ya..have to admit, its very hardd..

powergirl : tu la kan.. its hard, and oh expensive!

perempuan 1 : expensive for the men.. heh heh.. for the men.....

powergirl: eheh eheh.....

some pompuan, rasa empowered using men because memang tu purpose dorang, to be used.

some pompuan rasa weak using men, sebab tak independent.

pilih2.

lampu idea

Clash of ideologies. Hiak Hiakk.. zapp zapp.. tishh tishh... hiakk tish hiak tishhh..
ting ting zapp zap hiak tish hiak tish...

orgasmic female vocals

Dah overrated dah lawak2 last decade saye, yang berulang2.

Anyway, this was something I wanted to share dulu2 tapi lupa. Until nak tunjuk kat nadia.

Combo female vocals yang orgasmic sesangatttt....

Filled with last decade's memories..

Time hari raya haji, which is hari yang kena kemas utk keluar rumah, juga merangkap hari lalat2 bertelur... semua fell on the same day. Pastu kena marah kiri kanan sebab tak set priority betul2 walaupun semua tu is beyond my control. Especially kenapaa lalatt tuu nak beranak pada hari rayaaa and hari yang nak kena kuar rumah!! why!!!!!!!!!!

wow. memory tu clear.

Anyways, enjoy!!

think harder. I'm making a good argument here.

Ew, That is sooo last decade.
Owl city, Animals Collective, vintage wtfs, Wayfarers, 1Malaysia, even Avatar...

those are TOTALLY LAST DECADE. Please lah. Buat malu je mngaku kalau suka or ada or whatever... hahahahaa...

(relax, saje drama)

Tapi tahun lepas tu panggil decade ke apa eh.

kita ada 60an, 80an, 90an... pastu tahun lepas tu 00an ke or 00s. Nak sebut pun confuse. people tulis 2000s. still tak membantu kan.. gila pelik.

Kalau ada ujian membaca.

"Sila baca ayat berikut"

[Ketika dekad ke 00an, veganisme baru berkembang]

(mangkuk kau nak sebut ape nih!? pffffttt)

"ujian ini pas atau gagal sahaja ye incek"

Tu contoh masalah yang mungkin timbul, in ACTION.

Selalunya, orang2 tak suka decade yang baru lepas. Mcam, masa kita zaman 00an, kita tak suka sngat 90an... tapi bila nak hujung2 nak masuk 10an baru kita suka 90an.

Trends akan slalunye ulang balik, a decade sebelum last decade.

70s trends akan muncul balik sket2 dizaman 90s...
or 80s nye trends muncul di zaman 00s...

hipotesis dibuat, sebab babies of the X decade, plus 15 years old.. akan tetiba tersuka their moms fashion sense/music/or whatever sheyt.

so its X year + 15 years = minimum years for trends to comeback.

Skali lagi dengan bangga nya, another mystery telah di selesaikan.
Hawayou melaporkan, dari meja pengarang.


ps- tulisan kaler2 is sooo 10an...<--kalau sebut pakai mulut die extra lawak. ada unsur2 antiklimaks yg funny. hahahahahahahahahahhaha..




pps-explaining a joke makes it not funny. i know. haha..

2kx

sangat excited dengan tahun 2010. Azam tahun ni buat lebih detail seperti berikut.

1. baca lebih rss, lebih buku, lebih surat khabar.
2. makan sihat dan bersenam dengan konsisten
3. tidur 6 jam dan 5 minit power nap sehari.
4. buat azam harian dan self deadlines
5. think big and kick buttocks.

wish me miracle.